HOW TO BE MENTALLY STRONG: pic.twitter.com/LMIEhw9U7w
— Book Therapy (@Book_therapy223) September 26, 2026
Imagine that you were the coaching staff. What "absolutes" would you instill in your players? How. The shorter the list, the better.
1. Be a great teammate. "The strength of the wolf is the pack."
2. "Always do your best."
3. "Play harder for longer." Be relentless.
Fill our toolboxes...and fill them some more. If needed, get a bigger toolbox or discard some that you find unhelpful or dated.
CLAIM: Don Miguel Ruiz's The Four Agreements never goes out of style. Ruiz shares 'timeless wisdom' that improves our lives. We don't have to read the whole book. Understand and embrace the concepts.
The Four Agreements
A trip to Newburyport called for intestinal fortitude. Melrose knocked the Clippers from the unbeaten (9-0) ranks with a come-from-behind 23-25, 26-24, 25-17, 25-22 victory.
The win upped Melrose to 7-2 on the season.
This represented a signature win against the top-ranked team in Division 3 (10th overall) in the initial MIAA rankings. Area fans and coaches also got to watch on the NFHS Network.
A raucous home crowd supported the Clippers and built a second or third-round playoff atmosphere.
Melrose got off to a slow start in the first and was playing uphill most of the set. Nine service errors proved a hurdle too great to climb. Melrose showed promise with a lineup designed to get more blocking force with Sabrina McArt and Lorena Contin in the middle, and Elise Marchais pushed outside to compensate for injuries.
The second set didn't go as planned either as Melrose struggled against the 'Port block and trailed 15-21. Melrose injected a big dose of mental toughness as Sabrina got on a service run and evened the score. Down the stretch Melrose lost a set point at 24-23, but scored twice to even the match. Sophomore Lorena came through with a couple of key kills late.
Elise Marchais owned the third set with a mixture of smashes, line hits, tools, and tips. Only guessing that she had about nine kills and finished the set with an ace. She may need Daniel Webster in a legal battle to reclaim her soul after that performance. Melrose dominated the set with wins across the board and great work in the back from Anna Burns, Gen Overlan, Dani DiGiorgio, and Adriana Santoriello.
Melrose started slowly in the final frame, before rallying. It was a total team effort without weaknesses. Melrose led 23-20 when a Clipper serve slammed into the net. A final point secured the victory.
Melrose Notes:
A strong contingent of Melrose fans made the trek to Newburyport.
With a "total team win," everyone shares credit. MVB 25 tended to be predictable with future D1 commit Sabine Wenzel. This year, the offense attacks from all three front slots. I'd guess that Elise, Adriana, Lorena, Sabrina, and Amelie Johnson all had at least five kills.
Alisa Dautovic continues to see limited action with injury. Shout out to Ella Friedlaender, fully invested while awaiting surgery.
Melrose's six sophomores are young but experienced, five having played varsity last season and all six played in the Nationals this spring.
In other Middlesex League action:
Powerhouse Franklin upset Winchester, 3-0.
Reading topped Lexington 3-1.
Wakefield beat North Reading 3-2.
Maxpreps.com publishes updated state leaders.
Kills:
Elise Marchais ranks #48 with 67.
Assists:
Sadie Smith checks in at #6 with 211
Digs:
Anna Burns en fuego at #24 with 102
Bring your writing to life.
Writing serves many masters. Empower your storytelling. You must earn skill; nobody awards it.
Hemingway said, "Writing is easy. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed."
Neal Allen and Anne Lamott share "Good Writing," awarded New York Times Bestseller honors. The book amplifies Mr. Allen's "36 Rules."
A partial table of contents:
Strong sentences shoulder the load, as powerful verbs chop adverbs and adjectives. "See Spot run" works for Dick and Jane. "Spot raced around the course, prepping for the days when helicopter assaults exhausted everyone except him."
Write so well that everyone believes that AI wrote your story. Bring readers tears of agony or ecstasy. Craft stories that keep readers engaged and turning the page.
Overcome the 'tyranny of the blank page'. Then let it sit. Some authors like Joyce Carol Oates allow a piece to marinate for months. She revises the draft into finished craft.
Sometimes, you will struggle to finish a piece. Just as in volleyball, keep going. Finish the job.
Remember, "the strength of the wolf is in the pack."
Lagniappe. Protect your standards. "Leave the jersey in a better place."
View on Threads
Today's action is why you play. Melrose (6-2, #3 in D2 MIAA rankings) travels to Newburyport (9-0, #1 in D3 MIAA rankings).
Big opportunity for both clubs to battle quality opposition.
The Clippers notched meaningful wins against potent Lynnfield and Marblehead.
Melrose wants to build on recent wins as it returns players from injury.
The game is broadcast on the NFHS Network (subscription).
"There is no shortage of good days. It is good lives that are hard to come by." - Annie Dillard in The Writing Life
The principal advantage of youth is the expectation of having a long life to accumulate experiences and wisdom. Having a philosophy to guide you along that path helps create those good days and good lives.
An ICU physician's assistant asked those he met for an idea. He didn't specify from what domain. Perhaps he got recipes for Brussel sprouts, movie or book recommendations, or famous quotes. I told him, "share something great."
Your Volleyball Life
Drink deeply from the wellspring of coaching around you. You never know when a nugget of wisdom will change everything. It might be, "Speak up. Don't be a church mouse." The best ideas, unseen and unheard, are invisible and wasted. Or as Gia told Sadie Jaggers, "Make a good pass, not a great one." Good passes won't become overpasses or trap the setter at the net. Or "press the block."
Your Home Life
My father described some children as "street angels, house devils." Make your first priority being a good person everywhere - home, school, sports. "How can I help?" crafts a lot of good will. Thank your family for the opportunities that allow you to become the person you are today.
Your Academic Career
A patient came in with a complex problem and a difficult personality. The two best answers are often "I don't know, but I'll find out" or "That's a good idea, we should do that." Mine was, "I'm just a simple suburban doctor; you need to go to Boston." She said, "We both know that's not true, I do my research."
Your "burden of proof" is your track record. You cannot plead ignorance. The seniors left early last year for National Honor Society induction. Many of you 'frequent' the "Excellence" list or Honor Roll at MHS. "I do my research."
The Mr. Robinson Standard
You are not an island, a recluse, or a "lone wolf." What you do impacts those around you - what you think, what you say, and what you do. As the poet Maya Angelou said, "People will never forget how you made them feel." None of us can choose to be perfect; all of us can choose to be better.
Lagniappe. Shoulders are vulnerable to the forces applied to them. Warm up well.
There's a saying, "Nobody is coming to rescue you." On point 27 of the third set, Adriana and Alisa save the point.
Attack:
Alisa (8), Adriana (8), Elise (7), Amelie (6)
Assists:
Sadie (24)
Serving: (Points)
Anna (14), Elise (14), Dani (10)
Team Serve Percent 85
Digs:
Anna (13), Dani (9)
Receives:
Adriana (12), Anna (11)
Legendary basketball coach Pete Newell said that the coach's greatest responsibility is to help players "see the game."
In practice, "pass, set, hit" follows "vision, decision, execution." UNC soccer coach Anson Dorrance (22 NCAA titles) preached showing positive highlights.
Using the 'original' Pixellot footage, you have the option to slow the replay to study technique.
"Sundance" gets on top of a smash.
Elise understands the S's - short, sidelines, seams, or soft defender
Dani speaks softly and gets the job done.
"Gotta have it point." Alisa finishes.
Playing with force, Adriana scores.
Elise shows positional versatility and power.
Student-athletes are role models. What you think, do, and say matter.
The 'win-loss' record matters, but it's not the whole picture. Advocating for women's empowerment comes with the territory.
Always Do Your Best (the Fourth Agreement)
Every serve, attack, or dig won't be perfect in practice or in competition, whether it's high school or the Olympics.
On day one, Coach Ellis Lane laid out the priorities:
As seniors, Karen and Paula (a.k.a. KP) had some sports success. And all six seniors on the basketball team made the Honor Roll. "How you do anything is how you do everything."
Take Care of Your Body
Lauren Fleshman, former NCAA and Nike runner, wrote "Good for a Girl," an important book for athletes and coaches. Girls are not boys with a different chromosome. She pushes for self-care for women athletes and truth-telling.
Prioritize enough sleep. Student-athletes should get a minimum of eight hours of sleep.
Eat right. Teens don't control everything in their diet. Adequate protein intake (1 - 1.5 grams/kilogram) is a target. Eat more fruits and vegetables.
Hydration. "Dehydration" (volume depletion) shows up first as fatigue before thirst. Make the water bottle your companion and use it.
Recovery. After practice or competition, develop a recovery routine. That could include a thermal contrast shower, foam rolling, as well as hydration and diet.
Lead
Upperclassmen set the tone. Find opportunities to lead and track them. In your journal, express your private thoughts and how you responded to leadership opportunities.
Leaders control what they can control. There's an old saying that "you can't fool dogs, kids, and volleyball players." Everyone can lead though focus, hard work, and never being a distraction.
Be seen and heard.
Lagniappe. High contact point and trunk rotation both are important attack elements. When competition starts, focus on the game, not technical aspects. The great golfer or hitter can't think about their swing "in the box."
Exceptional teams connect with their fans. They deliver emotion and premium performance.
In 2003 nobody expected Melrose to sweep 22-0 Arlington Catholic, which had not lost a set all season. A topspin smash by Denise Applegate finished the Cougars. Melrose entered the sectional title business.
In 2009, Melrose upset Barnstable, the "brand name" in Massachusetts volleyball. A signature win catalyzed the start of a four-peat of sectional titles, ending with a State Championship.
Fans connect when they feel they become part of the story. "They" become "we." Teams earn energy from the fans and return it. The experience became infectious.
Great stories often capture unexpected success. Being 'too small', 'too young', or unknown sometimes helps.
Build a brand connection one fan at a time.
Everyone needs rules. Interpretation helps.
First, from former Secretary of State General Colin Powell, his list of 13 Rules:
Love your losses
"Losses are lessons." Postmortem analysis informs us of where we need to be better. This confirms General Hal Moore's rule, "There is always something more you can do." Some wins reflect triumphs of the spirit. Appreciate even the more pedestrian ones.
Deep dive
Track your results. Was the issue scoring or defending? We don't control points clearly won by opponents or gifted by their errors. If the error was not scoring, was it serving, attacking, or blocking? If it were serving, was it an error, location, or pace and movement?
Categorize problems
Coach Kevin Eastman suggests four possible solutions:
Abraham Lincoln wrote "Hot letters" to generals or politicians whose actions frustrated him. At the bottom he wrote, "Never signed, never sent" and filed them. Emotion can cloud our judgment. "Hold fire" to let cooler heads prevail. Or as James Kerr wrote in Legacy, "Keep a blue head."
Behavioral economist Danny Kahneman wrote Thinking: Fast and Slow. People have a rapid response thinking system to avoid immediate danger...so called "System 1" or "reflexive" thinking. And we have a deliberate process, "System 2" or "reflective" thinking. It's often better in the morning after we think about the problem.
Powell's Rules followed a lifetime of experience across many domains. He served as an Army General, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs, National Security Advisor, and Secretary of State. Good leaders multiply experience as they surround themselves with great people.
Create your own rules and share the best ones.
Lagniappe. Coaches help you explore outside the comfort zone.
Tom Brady: “You need coaches that push you outside your comfort zone because that’s how you grow and that’s how you develop self confidence and self esteem. They push you to deal with failure.” pic.twitter.com/yGwDhNbzaa
— Vala Afshar (@ValaAfshar) April 19, 2026
Lagniappe 2. Another in the series of "women being seen and heard." Kara Lawson says that it's not going to get easier.
Arlington created more than a few headaches for Melrose last season and did so again tonight as Melrose won 25-12, 27-25, and 25-22. When Melrose was challenged they made enough plays to win.
The win lifts Melrose to 6-2, 4-2 in ML12 play.
Melrose dominated early, cruising to an easy first set win.
The Kid was always around. She brought coffee. Ran errands. Worked. Didn't say much. Encouraged people. If she weren't around, they asked, "Where's The Kid?"
Once in a while, The Kid had a suggestion, "Have you thought about...?" Later people started asking her for opinions.
On every good team, the stars get most of the ink and the love. The Kid keeps showing up.
In 2022, Gia Vlajkovic was the alpha, with 338 kills. Ruth Breen had 639 assists. Anna Shoemaker had 115 kills. She was The Kid.
It takes awhile for the The Kid to emerge from the shadows. On exceptional teams, she always does.
Lagniappe. Polls and rankings serve entertainment purposes, except for the MIAA power rankings, determining seedings and playoff sites. The latest Maxpreps.com rankings are out.
"Be a rainbow in somebody else's cloud." - Maya Angelou
Prepare to make a difference. The best time to start was yesterday. The next best time is today.
Think about sets in terms of individual points. Defense coordinates the front and back row with getting "hands on" essential.
Multiple subskills determine blocking:
You're a fan and maybe a parent and want to know more about sports. What literary avenue should you pursue?
"The Politics of Coaching" by Carl Pierson
The late Dr. Pierson wrote a magnificent book for coaches and sports parents. He explains how politics is inevitable and often damaging for high school sports programs.
I've seen it remotely as a local (not Melrose) politician tried to take down a coach who cut his son. And I've seen upperclass parents (not volleyball) try to undermine underclassmen who threatened their children's status and playing time. Pierson's book should be mandatory reading.
"Game Changer" by Dr. Fergus Connolly
Connolly, a Human Performance specialist, discusses his experiences with great coaches around the world and lays out the tetrad of skill, strategy, physicality, and psychology in fashioning elite athletes.
"Legacy" by James Kerr
Kerr profiles the world's most dominant sports team - the New Zealand All-Blacks rugby program. Their culture focuses not only on sport, but individual growth, and incorporates elements from the Maori.
"Good for a Girl, A Woman Running in a Man's World" by Lauren Fleshman
Sports and athletes do not arrive in a "one size fits all" mold. Some coaches and other adults remain trapped in Neanderthal perspective.
"Search Inside Yourself" by Chade-Meng Tan
SIY is a book about the science and practical applications of mindfulness in promoting high performance. I read it three times. Mindfulness improves attention, grades, behavior, sleep, blood pressure and mental health. And it's free, apolitical, and non-religious. So you're not stepping on anyone's toes.
The saying goes, "The journey is better than the inn." Neither children nor sports programs come with instruction manuals. Melrose parents tend to be sophisticated about the processes, yet all of us can benefit from understanding more about the pathways and pitfalls ahead.
Lagniappe. AI input re: "Good for a Girl"
Here are twelve key points from Good for a Girl: A Woman Running in a Man's World (2023) that would resonate well with a coaching-and-leadership-focused sports blog audience — especially one covering a girls' program like the Lady Raiders:
