Consistency

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"Repetitions make reputations."

There is no substitute for skill. The best liberos Melrose ever faced were from Marlborough in 2003 and 2011, different in style but similar in spectacular results.

Keep grinding toward consistency.  

Actions Have Consequences

"Mature simplicity" results from learning not only from our mistakes but from others'.

I asked ChatGPT Plus for a summary of the "Cigar Scandal" and to provide a synopsis and lessons. Similar events can and do happen elsewhere. 

Separate the facts from the emotion.

The biggest lesson is about leadership under ambiguity.

What actually happened?

The basic facts haven't changed.

• Several recently graduated lacrosse players were photographed appearing to smoke cigars after graduation.
• Under the Massachusetts Interscholastic Athletic Association Chemical Health Rule, tobacco use during the season carries mandatory athletic consequences.
• The superintendent determined that enough evidence existed to conclude the players had violated the rule and declared multiple players ineligible.
• With too many players unavailable, the team chose to forfeit its Division 4 state semifinal rather than play short-handed.

The controversy escalated when parents argued the cigars were actually homemade props filled with tea rather than tobacco. School officials later released a detailed timeline disputing that claim, stating that the receipt offered as evidence appeared to have been generated only after the investigation had begun and that other evidence pointed toward real tobacco use.

LESSON 1. 

Social media is now part of the athletic environment.

One parent's Facebook photos reportedly triggered the investigation. That alone is a lesson for every high school athlete. Years ago this celebration probably would have remained private.

Today:

Someone is always recording.

LESSON 2. 

Leadership often involves incomplete information.

School administrators believed they had sufficient evidence. Parents believed administrators reached the wrong conclusion. Administrators rarely have perfect certainty.

They must decide based on evidence. That's uncomfortable, but leadership often is.

LESSON 3. 

Mandatory policies remove discretion.

Many community members asked:

"Couldn't they just have issued a warning?"

The MIAA Chemical Health Rule leaves relatively little room for case-by-case judgment once a violation is established. Ironically, many people discovered after the controversy that they weren't actually upset with the principal. They were upset with the underlying rule.

LESSON 4. 

Parents complicated the story. 

This may be the most unfortunate aspect.

Had everyone simply acknowledged:

"The boys exercised poor judgment."

the story probably would have ended quickly.

Instead, the debate shifted toward:

• fake cigars,
• receipts,
• grocery store investigations,
• altered timestamps,
• police body-camera footage,
• lawyers.

The original issue became secondary.

LESSON 5. 

Decisions were final. There is no do-over. 

• The semifinal forfeit stands.
• The season remains over.
• The controversy has continued through media interviews, statements from the district, and legal representation for at least one family, but there has been no public indication that the MIAA changed the competitive outcome.

Coaching lessons

Ask:

"Would I be comfortable if this appeared on tomorrow's front page?"

If not...

Don't do it.

During an investigation

Truth matters. If a mistake occurred: Own it early.

Leaders should distinguish intent from judgment.

Nobody intended to throw away a Final Four appearance. Poor judgment often carries consequences far beyond the original act. That's a lesson teenagers sometimes have to learn the hard way.

As a coach, I found the loss of the semifinal opportunity genuinely sad.

Regardless of where someone stands on the school's decision, many seniors - including players who may not have been involved - lost their final chance to compete for a state championship.

That's a reminder that in team sports, individual decisions can have collective consequences.

A final thought

This controversy reminded me of something shared several times:

"Character is revealed long before the championship game."

The real lesson wasn't about tobacco. It was about decision-making. Championship teams prepare for big moments.

They also prepare for ordinary moments - graduation parties, social media posts, and celebrations - because those moments can unexpectedly become defining ones.

For me, that's the lasting coaching lesson. It's less about punishment than about understanding that every decision has second-order consequences, especially when you're representing a team. That idea applies whether you're a lacrosse player, a volleyball captain, or a physician leading an ICU.

Intangibles Are "Everyday Magic"

Six of the most important intangibles that coaches look for in players:
1. High character
2. Great attitude
3. Work ethic
4. Mental toughness
5. Leadership
6. Intelligence

— Sports Psychology (@SportPsychTips) July 7, 2026

Traffic in specifics. Don't say, "I play hard." Explain. "I communicate. I'm first to the floor. I'm first to pick a teammate up off the court." Examples:

High character 

• Teamwork
• Selflessness (Team first)

Great attitude

• Positivity
• Coachability

Work ethic

• "Never cheats the drill."
• Relentless 

Mental toughness

• Performs under situational duress (pressure)
• Performs when not physically at peak

Leadership

• Models excellence (home, school, sport)
• Resource for teammates ("available")

Intelligence

• Makes the right play consistently
• Reads plays to become a step quicker 

Lagniappe. "Hindsight held a level of perfection that real-time decision-making could not provide." - David Baldacci in "Long Road to Mercy"

Lagniappe 2. Float serve short 

The Well-Coached Team

Is your team well-coached?

via @coachneighbors pic.twitter.com/B8lXsCAYZq

— CoachLync | Tools & Playbooks (@CoachLync) July 3, 2026

Coaches "check the boxes" to put players and teams in position to succeed. Coach Lync (via Mike Neighbors) shares some hallmarks of successful organizations. 

There is never one "central tenet" that represents the character and competence of strong organizations.  

"Success leaves fingerprints."

Excellent teams manifest the "Core Four" of technical, tactical, physical, and psychological proficiency. 

Lagniappe. Solidify your fundamentals. 

Behavior Modification

"Behave." Hearing that shouldn't mean "stop that," but direct your attention and focus to productive activity. 

Among the thirteen MVB returners, any could earn significant roles - starter, rotation player, key contributor. 

Education changes behavior. Teachers (and coaches) are educators and thus change behavior. How? 

Direct Order

Do this under my authority or suffer the consequences. Directives remove player 'autonomy' (self-direction) and aren't the ideal way to 'drive' behavior via autonomy, mastery, and purpose. This is the stick of carrots and sticks. 

Motivation

Motivation often links to rewards. Do "A" and earn "B." One limitation of this approach is still external. Motivation tends to work better for certain activities than others. "Stuff 500 envelopes and you can have comp time." It tends not to work for high performance behavior. 

Inspiration 

Few of the thousands of Olympic athletes arrived in Milan because someone promised them a bonus or better housing. There's a saying, "The price of an Olympic Gold Medal in figure skating is 20,000 falls." Only the athlete can weigh the costs and benefits. Nobody works hard to see their name in a volleyball blog. 

What's your Why? The MVB "Volleyball Experience" and "Culture" never works perfectly for everyone. And that goes for every sport at every level. 

Work hard, focus, and be coachable and the likelihood of a great experience is high. Among players that I coached, some were favorites despite not being the most talented, the most athletic, or recipients of the most playing time. 

What did they have in common? They were great teammates, hard workers, and high achievers off the court. High character alone won't earn vast amounts of minutes, only limitless respect. 

Lagniappe. Quiet and smooth... read and react. 

 

"No Days Off"

Melrose volleyball is all-in during the offseason. 

This week MVB players "do the work" at the UNH volleyball camp.  

The Cost of Winning

"When you become part of a team, you have to give up certain individual rights.
But, when you are a leader on a team, you have to give up even more."

A teammate helps carry the mission.
A leader helps carry the people. pic.twitter.com/oWeCizZHlW

— The Winning Difference (@thewinningdiff1) July 5, 2026

One word stands out from Coach Ellis Lane's teachings: "Sacrifice." 

Winning has costs - time, effort, what you want versus what the team needs. Putting the team first means putting yourself second. That's easy for many and difficult for a few. 

There's a saying from the old sci-fi television show Star Trek: "The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few...or the one." 

"Leaders eat last."  

Surround Yourself with Good People

"The more crazies you let into your life, the crazier your life will be." - Rolf Dobelli in "The Not to Do List"

Dobelli isn't always politically correct. Who is?

Surround yourself with good influences. That includes family, friends, books, and media. 

If you have to conceal your association with XYZ, then rethink it. If an action would disgrace you and yours on the Metro Section of your favorite newspaper or "Insta" don't go there. 

Actions have consequences. A parent might offer you alcohol in the privacy of your home. They might mean well but you're the recipient of suspension if discovered. The risk far outweighs illusory benefit. 

"Life is about the management of risk." As I recall, at one point, the last three world champion hang gliders had something in common. They died pushing the envelope. Hang gliding is intrinsically dangerous. 

"Mentoring is the only shortcut to excellence." Find great mentors and consider their advice. George Roberts was a humble carpenter who couldn't squeeze into every nook and cranny that his employees fixed. He told them to "do the work as though your signature was on it." Want your brand to represent excellence. 

"Good judgment comes from experience; experience comes from bad judgment." Combine that with "the best predictor of future behavior is past behavior." Protect your character and reputation by avoiding negative influences. 

The only "perfect people" are religious icons. There's no moral ambiguity attached to them by their acolytes. So none of our friends will be perfect, but knowing them well, decide whether they'll lift you up or drag you down. 

MVB has an exceptional coaching staff with a proven track record. Listen to their advice and work to follow their lessons as carefully as possible. 

Lagniappe. "Ring the bell." 

More Highlights

As an 'evaluator', watch more than outcome. For a hitter, examine:

• Footwork
• Armswing - does it help "launch" the attack
• Timing
• Size, strength, court movement, vertical jump
• Decision making
• Versatiliy (types of attack)
• Contact point (higher is better)

Where "longitudinal" video is available, that allows progression. I share video when I find it: 

Amelie Johnson (three-step attack 'reverses' to right-left-right for the lefthander) 

Be aware of limitations of video, too. Sample size and selection (highlight) bias, anchoring and recency bias (what 'sticks'), availability heuristic (what comes to mind may not reflect broader reality). 

Continual Ascension and Grit

Mike Reiss's Sunday ESPN column reminded me about 'developmental arcs': 

"As for special teams, Ninkovich recalled talking to former Patriots assistant coach Brian Flores about how the team ultimately gave him a roster spot, and what tilted things in his favor.

"He said the questions asked were, 'What's his upside? Can he play special teams? Is there a spot he can develop into?'"

 Legendary soccer coach Anson Dorrance spoke of seeking players with "continual ascension." An imperfect analogy for "special teams" is the "designated server" role, where a player or players substitute (usually for a middle hitter) with service and defense. This is a vital role where "runs" arise. Two memorable designated servers were Cassidy Barbaro and Michele Foley. I'm forgetting many others. 

Competition is always fierce for roles but especially so for MVB 26. The combination of graduation of important players and a large number of talented young players creates opportunity. 

Do not be content with making the team. Like Ninkovich, ask yourself:

• What's my upside? 
• Can I make the team better?
• Can I earn a role? 

Summer League (underway) gives players a chance to evaluate their progress and fit. 

Continual ascension has an underrated skill - grit. AI digression (via Claude.ai)

Grit, as defined by psychologist Angela Duckworth, is the combination of sustained passion and perseverance toward long-term goals — not a single burst of effort, but a steady commitment that survives boredom, setbacks, and plateaus. In sport, grit shows up less in the dramatic comeback and more in the unglamorous repetition: the extra sets of serves after a loss, the rehab exercises done alone in an empty gym, the athlete who keeps showing up for a role that isn't glamorous. It's distinct from raw talent or even short-term motivation. A gritty athlete doesn't necessarily have the most natural ability, but they treat failure as information rather than identity, and they hold onto a defining goal — making varsity, earning a starting spot, mastering a skill — even when progress is invisible for long stretches. Grit manifests differently across sports: in distance running it looks like pushing through the physiological wall; in volleyball it might look like a player who keeps taking cuts on defense after getting embarrassed at the net, refusing to let one moment define the match.

Building grit is less about willpower in the moment and more about designing habits and mindset over time. Coaches and athletes can cultivate it by setting "stretch" goals broken into smaller, trackable milestones, so effort has visible payoff even when the big goal is far off. Deliberate practice matters — seeking out drills that expose weaknesses rather than reinforce strengths, since growth lives in discomfort. Equally important is how athletes explain setbacks to themselves: a "growth mindset" framing, where a bad performance is treated as a data point rather than a verdict on ability, tends to produce more resilience than one that ties self-worth to outcomes. Finally, grit is contagious within a team culture — when captains and coaches model persistence after losses instead of excuses, and when effort (not just results) gets recognized publicly, it signals to younger or less experienced athletes that the daily grind is the actual competitive advantage, not a means to an end.

Lagniappe. This presents a high bar to hurdle. "This book began magnificently, went on very well for a long way with great stretches of great brilliance and then went on endlessly in repetitions that a more conscientious and less lazy writer would have put in the waste basket." - Hemingway

Lagniappe 2. Longer, excellent video.

 

Around the Horn - Quotes

They said it. (Via Boston Sports Journal)

Alijah Vera-Tucker (Patriots):

 “I think just to be a part of a team where everybody expects excellence - from the walkthroughs to the meetings to the practices - I'm just feeling really lucky and blessed to be part of something like that.”

Fernando Mendoza (Raiders):

"I do think what he said as a quarterback is you need to be the most everything. You need to be the most competitive. You need to be the most leader - you have to have the most leadership. You need to be the toughest, mentally and physically.

Core messaging 

1. Never take excellence for granted. Your culture has to promote excellence in attitude, process, and teamwork. That's everything - from equipment setup, warmups, practice, and cleanup.

2. Incoming players need guidance and direction to understand identity and performance. "This is who we are" and "that is how we do things." 

3. Leadership doesn't flow from titles or words. Model excellence through your everyday work and how you treat others. 

4. Mental and physical toughness are skills. Working hard in the heat is tough; so is playing the fifth set in a hot gym in September. Don't shrink from the responsibility. Want to be on the court when it matters because that's what you worked for. 

Lagniappe. What makes a good coach? 

The Tree Grows Without Making a Sound

She hopped down the wooden stairs and raced to the sand court in the back yard. It was only nine A.M. but the summer sun beat down without mercy.

The net seemed twice as tall as the girl. The only sounds came from robins in the sycamore trees.

She went over to the apple tree, not looking for the lowest hanging fruit. She jumped over and over, reaching for the fruit out of her reach. The unripe 'manzanas' weren't the point. It was the jumping, again and again.

Summers passed. As she walked to school, neighbors called her name, "Maria, Maria, que tal." 

She grew taller and stronger. She dreamed of the day she could easily clear the net and make the ball obey her. 

Every day, the same routine, the hopping, the jumping, the dream. 

Eventually, everyone knew her name in the high school, college, and trying out for the National Team. She owned the court, it no longer owned her. 

She found the game and the game found her. 

At 175 cm, she wasn't the tallest, simply the one who had been jumping for apples the longest.

(Author's note: this was an effort to tell a brief story in the style of Hemingway)

 

Recipes for a Miserable Life

All opinions expressed in the blog are solely my own. The blog is not an official publication of any City of Melrose organization. 

Rolf Dobelli shares "guaranteed ways to fail" in The Not to Do List. 

First, the table of contents 

What's the point of the Table of Contents here? TLDR (too long didn't read). Let's select FIVE to focus our attention. You would choose a different five. 

1. "Invite Bad People Into Your Life

Most people are good...think 95-5 as a baseline. The problem is that you'll devote an oversized portion of time coping with or dealing with the problems. If you were the fire chief and had fifty firefighters, maybe 47 are great - punctual, competent, dedicated. But you'll spend enormous time with the three slackers - late, full of excuses, missing work, behavioral problems. This impacts your TEAM and the public safety. 

The same can happen on other 'teams'. You have a college roommate who's a "cutter" that you're worried about. You're in a relationship with someone who isn't a good person.

You're not going to find big personality conflicts with MVB. Coach Celli makes it clear that if you're not going to be happy with your role, this might not be the right situation for you.  

2. "Celebrate Your Resentment"

Remember Coach Wooden's triad, "Don't whine, don't complain, and don't make excuses." Every MVB club, State Champion, four Finalists, ten Sectional winners, had at least one loss. 

You've all seen Frozen and heard "Let It Go." Learn from losses and then stuff them in the closet. Holding on to resentment isn't a productive way to live.

Unhappy with your role. Keep a positive attitude, work hard, and be ready for when your chance comes. It always does. 

Patriots' Coach Bill Parcells said, "Coaches are the most selfish people. We put the players on the field that we think will make us look good. 

3. "Expect Rationality"

Everyone knows that toxic people, tobacco, alcohol excess, and drugs are bad for you. The "rational person" would therefore not dive into the deep end, unable to swim. You're parents probably have said, "If your friend jumped off a bridge, would you?" 

Lead. Model excellence. Make good choices. Don't go rogue like Pinocchio to Pleasure Island and end up a donkey.  

4. "Drift Through the Day"

Writers need outlines. Chefs follow recipes - even at elite restaurants. Builders use blueprints. Why would we be any different?

"Plan your trade; trade your plan." The four legs of the volleyball stool - skill, strategy, physicality, psychology. You're sick of hearing it. That doesn't nullify it. 

Be intentional. Have a plan. Practice your footwork, your platform skills, your armswing, your float or topspin serve to specific areas. 

Respect the Yogi Berra quote, "You've got to be very careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there." Have a vision of what success looks like and the path to get there.

5. "Make Other People Feel Unimportant"

Life exposes three types of people - takers, matchers, and givers. Some people only take credit. Some will go "one for one," in exchanges (send me a patient, I'll send you one), and givers. 

You want to be seen, heard, and respected. Amen to that. If you're the hardest worker at practice daily, you'll get "shout outs," chances, and get credit as a great teammate. You could still be number 13 on the depth chart, but own self-satisfaction for always doing your best. 

Here's a secret. Coaches have pets - the players who are always early, positive, want to improve, want to win, and have a great attitude. What's not to like about that player? 

The path to failure is easy to find. Seek it and go the other way.

Lagniappe. "Got extra reps in before practice? – Celebrate it! Kept a cool head when under pressure? – Celebrate it! Achieved a personal best at practice? – Celebrate it! Received a good score on your exam? – Celebrate it! Achieved all your mini goals for today? – Celebrate it!" - Allistair McCaw in Habits That Make a Champion

Lagniappe 2. Ralph Labella called this, "Nicey-nicey." Don't. I know that all of you are high character players. Be a tough player, too. 

 

 

 

Getting the "W"

You need 3 daily wins: pic.twitter.com/uIRu9p5Oek

— Reads with Ravi (@readswithravi) July 3, 2026

Part of success is celebrating small wins. Like what? 

• Finishing a project.
• Reading a book. 
• Navigating a tough workout. 

Some days provide opportunities in leadership, mentoring, or 'crisis management'. 

Remember Suvorov's advice ("The General Who Never Lost") - "Always forward." 
 

Communicate Better, Write Better

"There is nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and bleed." - Hemingway

Be clear, specific, and understood. Better writing starts with intent, commitment to the your craft.

Benjamin Franklin chose the nine-year printing apprenticeship for exposure to the writing of others. His "Silence Dogood Letters" are legendary. 

Stephen King shares his process in "On Writing" which belongs in your personal library on your desk. Use stronger verbs, fewer adverbs, and find critics (his wife is his harshest reviewer). 

Dan Brown (The DaVinci Code) argues for "raising the stakes" and having a "ticking clock" adding tension. 

Salman Rushdie discusses the tyranny of the blank page and employing our "creative imagination" and our "critical imagination." Writing is rewriting. 

Anne Lamott says that "sh*tty first drafts" are part of the process. Get it down and then repair fix it. The 'delete' should wear out first on your keyboard. 

Good writers take assume risks, exposing private inner thoughts and inhabiting strange worlds. Find a muse. Ryan Holiday chose Robert Greene. Want my opinion? Holiday succeeded on his own. 

Writers share their "dos and don'ts." Very and really annoy me. Would you want a coach thinking "she's very, very good" or "she's exceptional?" Do you want Coach Scott Celli thinking believing, "She's really good" or "for her, the sky's the limit?" 

Bigger words don't equal better words ones. Hemingway wrote, “All you have to do is write one true sentence. Write the truest sentence that you know.” 

"Every story is about someone searching for something." In The Boys in the Boat, Daniel Brown wrote about excavates multiple searches - understanding the Great Depression, the rise of fascism in the 1930s, and chasing Olympic gold for Joe Rantz and the 1936 American crew team oarsmen. 

"But it's summer." Summer can be inform both vacation and opportunity. As James Clear (Atomic Habits) explains, "Habits are votes for the type of person you want to become." Special servers practice serving. Cooks exploit time and temperature variations to chase perfection. Writers write and revise. 

Read. Write. Revise. Repeat. 

Lagniappe. Stick to your standards. 

Eli Drinwkitz explains the difference between standards and expectations.

"Expectations are external, standards are internal."

"If we're worried about outside noise and expectations... that's a recipe for disappointment."

You don’t rise to expectations - you fall to your… pic.twitter.com/rWis45jJD7

— Coach AJ 🎯 Mental Fitness (@coachajkings) July 2, 2026

Shape It - Three Lessons

Who are your female role models? Maybe it's your Mom, another relative, a teacher, or someone else.

Society has systematically undervalued women since the dawn of history as described by Harari in Sapiens.

Sara Blakely is one of my role models. She considered law, sold fax machines, and became an entrepreneur. She founded "Spanx" a leading shapewear brand.

Here are three anecdotes that I find memorable:

As a child, she ate Saturday family dinners and heard her father ask, "What have you failed at this week." Failure isn't final and it usually teaches more than success. "Don't fear failure." 

As a successful entrepreneur she went on an "Outward Bound" type excursion. One of the assignments (while tethered for safety) was to jump out over a cliff to a 'teammate' who would catch her. She is short and not athletic. She was one of the few who made it. She was asked how she did it. She said that she didn't jump to the catcher...she jumped toward a spot three feet above him. "Aim high." 

She developed a mantra for her product that emphasized quality. This works for school and sports. "Make it. Sell it. Build brand awareness."

You got this. 

Lagniappe. Habits. 

My favorite line from Atomic Habits has been living in my head rent-free:

“It doesn’t make sense to continue wanting something if you’re not willing to do what it takes to get it. If you don’t want to live the lifestyle, then release yourself from the desire. To crave the result…

— CooperBaggs 💰🍞 (@edgaralandough) June 27, 2026

Build Trust Every Day

You don’t build culture with plays.

You build it with people.
• It takes trust.
• It takes respect.
• It takes caring about others.

That’s what makes a real team👇 pic.twitter.com/rk3aY2iPNI

— Coach AJ 🎯 Mental Fitness (@coachajkings) July 1, 2026

Trust gets you on the court. Trust keeps you on the court. It's more than overall performance.

You gain trust when you treat your parents and your peers well.

You gain trust when you work and succeed academically. 

You gain trust when you focus, show coachability, and perform in practice. 

You gain trust when your behavior "wins" outside the building. 

You gain trust when you make the team better and the players around you better. 

Lagniappe. When it's dusk, who are you?    

The best competitors don't rise to the occasion. They've already been there.

Cori Close calls it the LION mindset. 🔥

When everyone else tightens up, they lock in. When the moment gets big, they get bigger.

Watch. Share. Bookmark. pic.twitter.com/nw4WPFs7G8

— Greg Berge (@GregBerge) July 1, 2026