All opinions in the blog are solely my own. Blame nobody else.
"Coaches get more than we give." - Brad Stevens
Coaches are teachers. Education changes behavior. Every student won't have the same aptitude, interest, and commitment...just like teaching math or medicine.
The game is for the players. Remember that we help build programs not statues. There is always something to be learned and taught.
Manage our expectations, not the players'. Young players don't have the skill, experience, or maturity to be consistent. They make eye-opening plays and eye-rolling mistakes.
"Never be a child's last coach." When in our life has continual negativity and criticism strengthened us and made us more resilient? If a child quits a sport because of us, that's a strong statement.
There's a saying in Washington, "if you want a friend, get a dog." Everyone won't like us, players or parents. I coached a player who couldn't have been more of an "oppositional personality." Her mother wrote me years later to say that her daughter "figured it out," that coaching wasn't criticism. The girl became an All-League player at a charter school.
Get resources. Read the late Carl Pierson's The Politics of Coaching. Coach Pierson discusses many perturbations of human nature that impact coaches.
"Read, read, read, read, read." - Werner Herzog Read about basketball, coaching, fiction, and non-fiction. Be open to new ideas and concepts from other disciplines. I spent my junior year in high school as a 'stay ready' player doing metaphorical chicken chasing to prepare for a role as a defensive stopper.
We make mistakes. Often I was more concerned about setting lineups balanced for ball-handling, rebounding, scoring and playing time than winning. We would have won a lot more with more inequality.
Know the unholy trinity of minutes, role, and recognition. Nobody advocates for what is good for their child more than parents. I call it "The Prime Directive" that parents place their child above the welfare of the team. "The best predictor of future behavior is past behavior."
"Every day is development day." Coaches never regret having more skilled players with higher basketball IQ. Development applies for coaches, too. Learn from coaching groups, videos, watching basketball, and mentoring if possible.
Set boundaries. Never talk with parents about another parent's child. If they want to praise another player, then okay. But it's often fishing for praise for theirs. Have a cooling off period after games. Don't engage about playing time until everyone's had time to sleep on it.
Seek work-life balance. It's close to impossible, so manage those expectations.
Have a clear policy on transparency. I coached girls, so I invited parents to pre- and post-game brief discussions and practice. There was never going to be an accusation of inappropriate behavior. Volunteerism isn't worth crucifixion.
Network. Let players know that we are there for long-term personal and career growth for players. No college coaches are going to take my word over video evidence and personal observation. But coaches help steer players toward "good fits" and career success. Write recommendations. It's alright to bask in their reflected light.
"Do more of what works and less of what doesn't." My last group wasn't the best at containing the ball. Still, I believed in the value of teaching individual assignment (Man) defense over zone. I believed that was better for their development. So we won a few less games. That doesn't invalidate zones and hybrid defenses. In the playoffs in my final year, we switched to a triangle-and-two with the goal of taking away open threes and living with the paint-protectors protecting the basket. We beat a team that we had lost to seven times over three years.
Winning is hard.
"You have to scratch and claw and it never f–-ing ends. And it doesn’t get better, it just gets harder. So don’t complain to me that I’m making your life hard. You don’t even know what that means." - Deborah Vance in Hacks, Episode 2
Lagniappe. Golf.
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